Hey y’all! Here I am, blogging. This is not the first time I have started a blog; however, this is the first time I am starting with a purpose and a direction. In the past, I liked the idea of blogging, the idea of using it as a creative outlet, but I struggled to find a voice or what to exactly share. My husband would often mention to me my strengths, and even though they were not foreign traits to me I still just did not have the voice I felt I needed to truly move forward.
Even now, as I have been planning this out and writing down every single idea for a post or strategy, I feel some doubt about continuing to have things to write about. But that is part of the journey, always looking for things to write and share. I also feel like there is passion behind this specific drive to blog. I need to be better about looking at uncertainty as a positive challenge, an opportunity to grow rather than something to fear. We all have our fears, we all get discouraged and feel doubts whether about ourselves, individually or in aspects of our lives.
What changed? I became a mother. This is a career path I have considered many times and for quite some time– remember not my first blog. I even for a short time, had my own (at home) bakery. I love to bake, it seemed straight forward, but baking alone all day not as exciting as expected. Being a mother has been an experience I would have never been able to really comprehend before it happened. I know I am not alone in this feeling, even while carrying a child it just didn’t hit me. Going through all the beginning stages of learning to breastfeed and how to change diapers, it still seemed mostly surreal. Now, 19+ months later even though I don’t claim to have this down pat, I have sort of settled in. I’m still a work in progress as a mother and person. My child is growing more and more everyday and just when I think I have something figured out that stage is over. This is motherhood.
I am sooo extremely blessed to be a stay-at-home mama. With that said, it is no walk in the park. We are not wealthy or financially comfortable, but this is what we want and we are somehow (by the grace of God) making it work. Even though this is what I wanted for me and my child in the season of our lives, I still have felt a little lost at times. Here I am a mom now, I’m not getting dressed for my old 9-5 days, but instead rolling out of bed to an awake toddler every morning. It is truly a wonderful way to wake up, the best actually, even in my zombie-like/still asleep/get me coffee/need more sleep/whyyyy feeling (seriously though even if it were 10 a.m. I would probably feel this way). This mama is NOT a morning person, never have been. Add it to my list of struggles. I awake each day usually feeling behind but still wanting more sleep and starting the cycle over every single morning. Nonetheless, my mini wakes me and we go on with our day. Back to the lostness in motherhood though…. I can’t quite explain it but if you are a mom you must have some idea what I am talking about. That too is part of my drive for this. A way to find myself. Although, I don’t feel lost as often as I used to, time does not slow down and I need to kick it into gear. I need to do more for myself, because doing more for myself does in turn do more for my family.
This is my outlet. To share and be me. I am a lover of baked goods, crafts, style, cooking, coffee, wine and more.
Being a mother is a gift from God, and I plan to be more intentional in my duty. Thank you for joining me on this journey! I hope that this will also inspire you to make moves toward a better you– a happier you.